Special PODCAST:
This talk explores the power of loving kindness.
You’ll learn how you can open to receive kindness, how to tune in to those around you and anticipate how they best receive and explore what happens with the intention to live from an open heart.
iTunes podcast here, online listening here, stitcher here, and Jonathan’s YouTube channel here.
Special PODCAST:
From the afternoon Metta meditation at the 2015 IMCW Fall Retreat. Brief instructions and orientation and three guided meditations on shifting your relationship with pain.
You'll explore the zones of pleasant, unpleasant and neutral sensation, a loving kindness body scan and using mindful breath, offering compassion to your body.
iTunes podcast here, online listening here, stitcher here, and Jonathan’s YouTube channel here.
Special PODCAST:
This talk explores two fundamental wings of practice: Your capacity to pay attention on purpose and your capacity to be aware.
You’ll learn about the tremendous benefits of concentration and explore a helpful and accessible technique as well learn about the benefits of mindfulness and how wisdom and compassion arise when you pay intimate attention to what arises in each moment.
iTunes podcast here, online listening here, stitcher here, and Jonathan’s YouTube channel here.
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Recently I’ve been rebuilding our wood stove, putting on snow tires and checking my stock of wool socks.
We’ve had a cold snap and with the days getting shorter it’s easy to get out on the river well before sunrise, though now I’m wearing long underwear, my thermal gloves and heavy duty booties.
There’s a natural turning inward this time of year as the fall colors blossom and fade. I wish you well in a another season of transition.
here’s a look Tara gives me when she says, "We need to talk." It's a certain narrowing of her eyes and set to her jaw. My reaction is always the same, no matter how many times it happens. The thought process goes like this: "I know I'll be glad we had this talk. I know this is good for me. But nothing in me wants to do this right now!" Figuring out and managing one's own life path (dharma) is hard enough. Mix it up with another and things can get enormously complicated. As Tara and I have been teaching more about the the art of relationships, we've come to see that 'relational dharma' is a powerful and transformative path. One day Tara and I were in some conflict. I felt hurt by something she said but didn't say anything about it. I carried it around for days and I could feel resentment building up. When we finally sat down to clear the air, given how backed up my emotions were, my communication wasn't, to put it mildly, skillful. After I had emptied both barrels in a hot torrent of anger and frustration Tara paused for a bit and then said, "You know, I totally get it. I'd feel exactly the same way if that happened to me." Game over. I'd been heard. I got that she got it. We joke now that the first person to do a role-reversal wins. For both of us. A role-reversal is simply tuning into another's experience and imagining what it must feel like inside. When I'm around others now I try to remember to imagine and sense what they might need or want. From the cashier who I imagine might be feeling tired at the end of the day to the phone conversation where I imagine the other person needs to air out some as yet unspoken feeling, I see this practice as an opportunity to pause and practice empathy. Who knows if I'm just hallucinating, but it seems as though my capacity for compassion has increased a bit. One teacher said it comes down to this: Learn to see Self in Other and Other in Self. In December Tara and I are offering a weekend residential retreat on relationships. More below. If you'd like to catch a talk I gave on this topic you can listen via youtube, iTunes or streaming online. iTunes Podcast
Evening Class at the Unitarian Universalist Church of Arlington Learn More
Evening Class at the Unitarian Universalist Church of Arlington Learn More
A Meditative Journey: Dynamic Meditation
Learn More
Evening Class at the Unitarian Universalist Church of Arlington Learn More
Evening Class at the Unitarian Universalist Church of Arlington Learn More
Evening Class at the Unitarian Universalist Church of Arlington Learn More
Relationships Retreat at the Garrison Institute with Tara Brach Learn More
The light changes each month. I'm savoring the last of these colors before winter sets in.
I aim to get to the river before sunrise. This morning's glow lasted all of about thirty seconds.
Morning light flows between two islands.
Water, on the rocks.
Stopping over.
First light on Sycamore roots.
Backlighting on a small island.
Video and stills from this month. We work our way up-river, then literally go with the flow back down. I share a few of the more compelling clips and shots in recent weeks and if you like, you can do some coherent breathing as well.
at the Garrison Institute
Garrison, NY
December 4 - 6
Please come on your own, or with a friend, family member or partner!
Intimacy with others can be the ground for experiencing full aliveness and sacred communion.
Yet as so many have experienced, our relationships are also often the source of insecurity, hurt and betrayal.
During this weekend workshop we will explore the beliefs and feelings that separate us from each other and the meditative practices that enable us to cultivate genuine bonds of trust, understanding, intimacy and love.
Our time together will include short dharma talks, silent meditation, mindful movement, reflective inquiry and dyadic exercises.
To learn more, please visit: Garrison Institute.
Non-Violent Communication is one the most effective techniques I've ever run across for bridging the chasm between conflicted parties. There's an art and science to it, but I find it helpful to think of this as four inquiries: 1. What exactly are we talking about? What do we both agree actually happened?
2. What do I feel? (Hint: It's usually more than one feeling.)
3. What was I hoping for or wanting that didn't happen? (This can be a big shift from blame to identifying your unmet need.)
4. What is a life-affirming request I can make? (For example, "Would you be willing to find a time when we can talk about this?" "Would you be willing to tell me what I said so I get that you heard me?")
These four inquiries, if you attend to them with honesty, sincerity and diligence, can guide you to wisdom and compassion for yourself and the other.
To learn more about Non-Violent Communication, click here.
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iTunes podcast here, online listening here, stitcher here, and Jonathan’s YouTube channel here.
Video and stills from this most recent month. We work our way up-river, then literally go with the flow back down.
I share a few of the more compelling clips and shots in recent weeks and if you like, you can do some ‘coherent breathing’ as well.
iTunes podcast here, online listening here, stitcher here, and Jonathan’s YouTube channel here.
When I push off from the boat launch at sunrise and paddle up river I experience yet another teaching on impermanence.
I never know what’s in store.
There’s usually a surprise: morning mist, a rosy horizon, a new band of coots, a bald eagle or an unexpected configuration of light.
This day it was a particular blend of cool grey skies combined with a particular light that broke through the spotty cloud cover warming the peaking fall foliage.
iTunes podcast here, online listening here, stitcher here, and Jonathan’s YouTube channel here.
Special PODCAST:
This talk explores how you can shift your relationship to thoughts.
You’ll learn how thoughts are organic and natural, how thoughts are one aspect of ’the self', how to untangle obsessive thinking and how to turn your attention toward the source of thought itself.
iTunes podcast here, online listening here, stitcher here, and Jonathan’s YouTube channel here.
Special PODCAST:
This talk explores how you can skillfully shift your relationship to emotions.
You’ll learn about the anatomy of an emotion, how to untangle challenging and sticky emotions and the secret to being happy - no matter what.
iTunes podcast here, online listening here, stitcher here, and Jonathan’s YouTube channel here.
We are into our final full day of our weeklong silent retreat. This photo over the dorms sums things up well.
The more we pause the more we recognize that the moment is a weather system passing through.
Sometimes clear, sometimes intense storms pass through. Over time we recognize that we are not the weather. We have little control over the weather but rich resources to explore how we relate to it.
iTunes podcast here, online listening here, stitcher here, and Jonathan’s YouTube channel here.
Special PODCAST:
This talk explores the transformative power of seeing into the reality of interconnectedness.
You’ll learn how to overcome fear and contraction through a powerful meditation practice that can dramatically help you access compassion for yourself and others.
iTunes podcast here, online listening here, stitcher here, and Jonathan’s YouTube channel here.
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please signup here.
It’s the fall and inevitably this is the time of year when we start to refocus. I’ve been inspired to pay closer attention to how I pay attention. To that end, I’ve taken on a few new practices and others have as well. Some are recommitting to a meditation practice, some to taking better care through yoga and exercise. Part of practice is also deciding what you’re not going to do. Some folks have elected to cut out sugar, others to be more mindful by not talking about someone unless they are present, others are committed to more frequently substituting kindness for self-criticism.
My coffee grinder is packed away. My beloved aeropress sits next to it, not to see the light of day for at least thirty days. One month without coffee. I'm not looking forward to this, but I know it will be good for me. In the Year of Living Mindfully and the Monday Night Meditation class we're exploring "Thirty Days of Practice: One Observance and One Restraint." View the program here.
An observance is a practice to which you consciously commit, paying attention to it’s effects. You select a discipline you know will increase your vitality or will help bring you into greater balance.
A restraint is something from which you consciously refrain, paying careful attention to what happens. You might select a habit or activity you know is depleting or distracting.
Restraints are common in spiritual practice. On a meditation retreat you refrain from speaking, eye contact, recreational reading and writing. Holding back on habitual activity you become more aware of what is happening and how you relating to it.
My 'observance?'
I've been struggling with some neck pain and headache issues and decided my practice will be a yoga and exercise routine that lengthens chronic muscles but also builds strength.
I'd fallen out of the habit of these routines. When I started this week I was chagrined at how weak I felt in the wall sits, how hard the pushups were and how creaky I was doing lunges.
I know, though, that within the month the wall sits will feel effortless, the pushups will get me pumped up and the lunges will help me stay aligned through the day.
As for the coffee? You may note that I didn’t say 'no caffeine.' I've discovered matcha tea, which feels more steady and without the jangle. I don't crash like I tend to with a strong cup of coffee and this week I've been inspired to cut back even more on the caffeine, just to see what happens.
One week in and I’m feeling pretty good.
But taking on practice is easy. Keeping your momentum going for thirty days is another challenge.
More on that below.
If you’d like to listen to a talk on this topic. Click the image below.
If you’d like to read a post on this topic. Click the image below.
Look below for a handout and calendar you can download.
30 Day Calendar
30 Days Handout
Keynote at the US Trager Association Conference Learn More
Evening Class at the Unitarian Universalist Church of Arlington Learn More
IMCW Fall Retreat
Learn More
Evening Class at the Unitarian Universalist Church of Arlington Learn More
Evening Class at the Unitarian Universalist Church of Arlington Learn More
IMCW Half-day Retreat for Meditation Mentors Learn More
Evening Class at the Unitarian Universalist Church of Arlington Learn More
I was blessed to spend so much time outside and near the water this month. As you may know the 'magic hour' in photography is the time just before and after sunrise and sunset.
Sunset over the bay, Cape Cod.
Sunset fading to dusk. Cape Cod.
An exposed sandbar at low tide just after sunset. Cape Cod.
Seals hanging and conversing before sunrise. Off Provincetown, MA.
A bird zips by with a morning delicacy.
The last signs of color. Sunset on Cape Cod.
Look closely and you can see clouds of swallows feasting at sunrise. Potomac River, Great Falls.
Geese on the early morning move. Potomac River, Great Falls.
October 14th, 9:30-4:40 Bethesda, MD In the early 70's seekers were flocking to Puna, India to study with Bhagwan Sri Rajneesh, a charismatic and somewhat controversial teacher. He noticed many westerners were unable to quiet their minds enough to experience subtler states of awareness he was describing. Rajneesh created a process which closely follows the stages of Raja Yoga, but in a dramatically different way. On this retreat we’ll practice these stages and explore what happens when you move from the gross to the subtle through movement, sounding and finally, surrender into stillness and deep relaxation. The stages: 1. Energizing, energetic movement 2. Free-flow movement 3. Conscious breathing with sounding 4. Seated meditation 5. Lying down meditation 6. Seated meditation and journaling The afternoon will offer more traditional practices including mindful movement, a lying down guided body scan and sitting meditation. I've been practicing and leading Dynamic Meditation for about 30 years and can testify to it's potency. Please do come if you'd like to explore a non-traditional approach to stilling the mind. No prior experience in yoga or meditation required. Just an open mind and heart.
(Note this is on my old youtube channel.)
For more information and to register, click here.
The Seinfeld Method
Jerry Seinfeld, when he was starting out, knew the key to his success was to write his own original material. That meant writing every day. No. Matter. What.
He developed a way to keep himself going that is quite genius. No apps required. It’s pure analog.
Get a monthly calendar (you can download one here.) Get a big red marker and when you complete your practice for the day, but a huge "X" on the day. Place the calendar where you see it. Your goal is to keep the visual chain going.
Be Accountable to a Friend
Another practice that can dramatically help you when taking on a new discipline is to find a friend who is willing to support you. Here’s what I recommend and have found helpful:
Send a daily email and in the subject line, share what you accomplished (or failed to accomplish.)
Your partner is not obligated to respond.
But they will notice and that can make a huge difference.
Download the 30 Day Calendar Here
Download the 30 Days Handout Here
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please signup here.
iTunes podcast here, online listening here, stitcher here, and Jonathan’s YouTube channel here.
Special PODCAST:
The talk is about how you can use your body as a vehicle for seeing clearly into the nature of reality.
You’ll learn about what the Buddha actually said about contemplation of the body, different ways to practice and what to expect when you sustain attention the direct experience of your body.
iTunes podcast here, online listening here, stitcher here, and Jonathan’s YouTube channel here.
Heading south tomorrow morning …..
I’ve had the great fortune to sit on the edge of the continent this last week.
It’s been a gift to have this time to watch the weather and light in flux, as well as the internal weather systems.
It’s curious as how, when we relax, we become more aware of the horizon and what lies above and beyond it.
I’m looking forward to the fall, diving back into the richness of my life, though as always after time away, it’s hard to imagine protecting this spaciousness.
I’ve got a few ideas, though.
I’ll be proposing a way to build in a little more awareness into each day.
If you live in the DC area, feel called to volunteer in a way that has huge impact and develop your chops as a teacher, this is a beautiful way to serve. You would be joining a community of inspired and inspiring teachers and guides.
Volunteer Teaching with Insight on the Inside Insight on the Inside is a volunteer program that teaches meditation and mindfulness to incarcerated men and women in the DC area. Volunteers: * are interested in sharing the benefits of mindfulness * understand the importance of a generosity practice * have some time to dedicate every month (between 6-10 hours a month) * feel passionate about ever-deepening their practice * are interested in training to facilitate and teach classes If you are interested in volunteering, you will be interviewed about your sitting and retreat practice and your availability to participate in IOI's monthly meetings, quarterly 1/2 day trainings and on-line trainings such as Fleet Maulls' Path of Freedom. An example of a recent 1/2 day training that IOI volunteers found very beneficial is Ruth King's seminar on the Dynamics of Oppression. In our monthly meetings IOI volunteers are encouraged to share their insights, questions, and concerns that have arisen from on-site experiences and the intersection of those experiences with our meditation practice. In this way we all learn, grow, and support each other. Please contact Carolyn Stachowski carolynstachowski@gmail.com
"The more you’ve got going on in your life," a Rishi once said, "the more you need to be on retreat."
If you’re juggling a lot and want to be more effective, schedule some down-time!
With lots of responsibility, your task is to amp up your executive functioning - your capacity to decide what is going to get done and what is not.
You also need to stay sensitive to what is just over the horizon. Your intuition needs to be active. In order to do that you need to be relaxed and alert.
A retreat, whether a daylong, a weeklong or a month, gives you not only the opportunity to step back from your routines, habits and ruts, but the chance to drop into some new practices that inevitably will inform and inspire you.
A dyad practice on a recent retreat.
September 24-25: The Energy Intensive at Kripalu Center https://kripalu.org/presenter/V0000107/ October 9- 16: The IMCW Fall Retreat https://imcw.org/Calendar/EventId/161/e/fall-weeklong-2015-9-oct-2015 November 4: A Meditative Journey: Dynamic Meditation https://imcw.org/Calendar/EventId/289/e/daylong-a-meditative-journey-14-nov-2015 December 4 - 6: "Releasing the Barriers to Love" - Relationships Retreat at Garrison Retreat Center (with Tara Brach) http://www.garrisoninstitute.org/component/civicrm/?task=civicrm/event/info&reset=1&id=642&Itemid=534 December 27 - January 1: IMCW New Year’s Retreat https://imcw.org/Calendar/EventId/314/e/new-years-retreat-2015-27-dec-2015 Check out www.imcw.org for a retreat that might be a match.
Special AUDIO:
This talk explores how you can dramatically enhance your capacity to see clearly.
You’ll learn about the nature of sustaining attention on non-judging awareness and the liberating practice of recognizing and naming the weather patterns of the mind.
iTunes podcast here, online listening here, stitcher here, and Jonathan’s YouTube channel here.
